Location: Some locally-owned Coffee Shop
Characters (All regulars at the shop):
Jeroh: Male. Athlete at a local sports team. Good looking. Insecure of Morgan’s occasional homosexual nature.
Vikki: Female. Slightly plump, down to earth Hair Stylist. Wears glasses. Has a crush on Jeroh.
Samantha: Party Girl/Barista. A better artist than her boyfriend.
Morgan: Barista. Flamboyant, open sexuality which he teases Jeroh with from time to time.
Samantha: So I was at Tom’s show last night, and I’m sitting at a table with a couple of his friends..
Vikki: They still let him play shows? Didn’t he beat up some guy in the audience last week for saying that he sucks? (laughs)
Sam: They still let him play shows, Victoria. (to herself) ...within court ordered guidelines...
(Jeroh looks over from a book, concerned)
Sam: ...anyways this one guy kept bringing up all these sexual ‘moves.’ You know? Like donkey punch and stuff.
Vikki: Um... no?
(Jeroh grins, Morgan grins)
Sam: It was annoying, he just kept going on and on. Plus he kept calling me ‘Dawson’s Freak’ because he said Tom looks like James Van Der Beek....anyways, they were stupid. I would never do some of them.
Vikki: (To herself) ...cause you needed to say that last part.
Sam, thinking: One of them was sort of funny though.
Vikki: What was it?
Sam points across the street to their competitor, the Starbucks: It’s called the ‘Starbuck’
(Jeroh laughs to himself.)
Vikki looks at him: You know what it is?
Morgan: I know what it is.
Vikki looks to Morgan: I’m the only one that doesn’t? What is it?
Morgan grins, reluctant, looking to Sam.
Sam: Ok so the guy is doing you from behind, right? And then he shouts out the name of a celebrity, and (she motions with both hands in front of her) ‘bucks’ you really hard.
Jeroh bursts out laughing.
Sam: It’s not that funny. If Tom ever did that to me I’d.... well it would depend which celebrity.
Morgan: That’s the whole point. You clearly weren't listening.
Vikki: What do you mean?
Morgan: Well it’s like a game. If the girl stops and turns around then you picked the wrong one, but if she’s ‘oh yea...’ then you say another name and buck. If you can get three in a row then you try with an ass slap---a ‘slapaccino.’
Vikki: Seriously? People actually do shit like that? How do you know this anyways?
Morgan hesitates, looking at the floor: I read it on the TMZ website.
Vikki, incredulously: Oh my god! You’ve played the game!
Sam claps her hands: You have!
Jeroh tries to go back to his book.
Morgan shakes his head, blushing: No... I haven’t
Sam: He has, too, oh my god. Ok you have to tell us who it was!
Vikki: Tell us!
Morgan, smiling: I don’t know what you’re talking about.
Jeroh forces a laugh, putting the book down: Come on, girls, leave him alone.... ...seriously.
Vikki, Sam: Tell us, tell us, tell us!
Morgan, smiling still: Ok! Ok! Just stop chanting, before someone comes in here and asks to buy a cellphone.
The girls listen eagerly. Jeroh tries not to.
Morgan: ...Ok first of all this guy was an idiot... but ok so we’re doing our thing, and he’s behind me, then out of the blue he says: Jonathan Franks
Everyone bursts out into laughter, trying to talk at the same time.
Vikki: Oh my god, the guy from Star Trek, and... what was that show? Beyond Belief ...(Fact or Fiction?)
Sam, excitedly: Fact or Fiction!
Jeroh, to himself: That’s fucking hilarious....
Sam: So what happened?
Morgan: I turned around. I was like ‘what the hell was that?’ the guy just sort of shrugged and said (disgusted with the words) ‘I had you pegged for a trekkie.’ I mean come on...did he have to say peg?
Morgan, shaking his head: Anyways, it’s a stupid move. All those moves are stupid. I mean who actually does takes it beyond the urban dictionary and does it?
Vikki: Tom’s friends?
Jeroh: Dawson’s Freak!
Sam: Who do you think was the freakiest person on Star Trek?
Vikki: Well Deanna Troy was definitely the most slutty.
Morgan rolls his eyes. “Cause she had a triangle-shaped cleavage? Come on she was an empath, she couldn’t help feeling horny around guys.”
Jeroh: I’d say Jordie LeForge.
Vikki, laughing: Levar Burton?
Jeroh: Definitely. Down there in the engineering section, you know that guy was swinging pipe. Plus he can see through clothes with his visor. I mean come on, tell me he hasn’t tied up a couple ensigns with the ‘warp injector coils’ if you know what I’m saying.
Vikki: I didn’t know you were such a Star Trek fan.
Jeroh: Oh yeah. Think about it: They’re all listening to Packard in the conference room and Jordie’s just sitting there with a big grin on his face. Know why? Cause Jordie’s streaming a steamy porn scene onto his visor and rubbin it out under the desk.
Vikki: That’s... gross.
Morgan rolls his eyes.
Sam, watching the two: Plus, Reading Rainbow. I mean hello?
Jeroh: .... hello...what?
Vikki: I bet Beverly Crusher gets a little action from Warf every now and then. A single mom, up there all alone...(is thinking to herself) She might need some ‘extra security’
Jeroh: Seriously, the Klingon?
Sam, whispering to to Sam behind the lattle machines: Oh my god.... Vikki has a crush on the guy whose head is crushed! Her fantasy is to be Crusher!
Morgan, after a moment of awe, whispering back: Oh my god Sam that was epic.